Readers Questions

Dear loyal readers, Reverend Rick has finally landed a true readers question. I must mention that getting pissy about no-emails must have landed me my first e-mail. I must say anger pays off. So to kick of my first Readers question, here's a big salute to you readers and future readers, may I never get bored of your questions!



Dear Revered Rick,

Why did the color pink get assigned to girls and blue to boys? Why is it when you have two teams if one is wearing red and the other blue, red always wins? Do you think it is because red is similar to pink, and that girls are naturally better than boys?

Sincerely,

Jo Wants to Know


Dear Jo Wants,

I must first comment that it is true that across cultures pink is more often assigned to to girls and blue to boys. You are also semi-correct in the comment about "red always wins". Research shows that teams that wear red win more often. (but not always miss Jo-wants-to-know-it-all).

The reasons for these things are as rich and varied as Aunt Tilly's home-Knit Christmas Sweater, her Christmas punch and Aunt Tilly all rolled into one hob-nobbin' yule log! So Get ready for a SHOCKING (but conveniently sexually biased) TRUTH!

The truth of the matter predates the history of man altogether and goes straight into the history and evolution of Dinosaurs.



Keep in mind that this ribbon on the Dino pic is not ordinary pink ribbon. Strangely enough, it is actually a fungus that commonly grew on the necks of female dinosaurs. It is believed that the pheromones of male or female dinosaurs contributed to the color the fungus that coated the bewildered baby Dino's blue or pink. The fungus had many different color variations, some of them complex, that effected the Dino's in many different ways...




Well, what the hell does this have to do with us as human people you might be asking. Well, as you may have guessed by now, we are not descendants of the dinosaurs. But we are descendants of the proto-geological sludge that became the fungus that mushroomed into mankind...





Science-type intellectuals with degrees spanning the globe have uncovered many quirky things about these fungi, their evolution, and their role in our gender style, preferences, and smartness or dumbnesses.

Smarter people have shown that a particular combination of your "frfa's" or "functioning retroactive fungal anomalies" leads you to your clothing choices, your preferences and a distinct mapping of your "a.w.e.s.o.m.e.n.e.s.s" or "acute, whole, evaluative, summary, of, me, excluding, naysayers , except, sometimes, sally".

The depth and extent of this profound research study has yet to be determined, but it proves to shake the world of science, not to mention the fashion industry, to it's core.



While the "smoking gun" of why women have frfa's that point to smaller amounts of a.w.e.s.o.m.e.n.e.s.s have yet to be determined. We have known that primary, secondary or tertiary colors are more bold then mixed shades like pink.


The unmixed colors like blue or red when taken in the light of a warring and competing fungus from which we evolved show that blue is peaceful and red is warring. It is not gender specific in the realm of all out war (Red) or lasting peace (blue), but when it comes to the watered down version or red (Pink) we understand the nature of this fungal organism to be attuned to small wars and pointless battles which seems to cling to women like a fungus.



The end.

Reverend Rick


P.S. I love's you alls so don't worries.
Not to override my own point, but I'm still giving all my respect to tha ladies fighting breast cancer, as Oct. is breast cancer awareness month. (I'm aware of the irony considering i just bashed the color pink and all women everywhere...)

.....Love you Jo

Readers Questions

Since starting this blog less than a week ago you may remember that I requested to have readers questions that i could answer. I even included a fictional example to warm you up to the idea.

I have not received one as of yet. I am writing this on Friday to post automatically on Monday morning. I am assuming I didn't get fan mail over the weekend either.

May I ask, what did you do over the weekend that was so pressing you couldn't talk to the Reverend?? Hmmm? The Lord has a temper, and how much more is my temper considering how much less of a man/god i am than him....



So. I'm pissed. But that's ok. (this is actually a pre-emptive pissyness considering this was written friday and i expect no mail this weekend.)

I'm going to let it slide though. And just for your benefit I will include one more sample readers question to get the ball rolling....(lets not make a habit out of this).

Dear Reverend Rick,
I have a hole in my jock and I have never worn it. In fact I do not play sports and have never even bought one. Why is this?

Holden McCrotch
Brighton MA

Dear Mr. McCrotch,
What the hell is your question? Are you asking me why you have a hole in your Jock or why you are so ignorant as to believe it is actually yours? If you've never bought one and don't play sports, either it was a gift from someone that doesn't know you very well or you stole it. Either way you are a stinking dirty liar who has a hole in his jock. Maybe you will consider next time that you are the jock and your story is also the jock. The end.

Loves and Kisses,
Reverend Rick

AND REMEMBER EMAIL ME YOUR QUESTIONS!!!
richard.kreativekarma@gmail.com

Sunday Funny

One more comic. Happy Sunday! See you again Monday.

Please Click on comic to see the entire strip...


I made this in Illustrator and it looks like the brush effects got blotchy when i re-sized. I should know better!

Butter Side Up

Every now and again I'm going to start posting some comics i have made. If people like them, maybe they can get their own site some day!

Please click on the comic to see it enlarged.



That's it for now. I'll have one more for Sunday.

Gandi's B-Day / International Non-Violence Day

"As soon as we lose the moral basis, we cease to be religious. There is no such thing as religion over-riding morality. Man, for instance, cannot be untruthful, cruel or incontinent and claim to have God on his side." - Gandhi



In Honor of Gandhi's Birthday today I am including one more post today. October 2nd is Gandhi's Birthday and International Non-Violence Day, thanks to the courageous Gandiji.

First off i want to say that I deeply respect and love this man. His ability to lead with non-violence set an unprecedented benchmark that future generations should deeply study and emulate. I think people have easily forgotten the message that non-violence is the best way to secure a definite peace for ourselves and possibly an even larger world peace.

He believed facing violence with non-violence is not cowardice but the highest act of bravery. One is not running to hide, but you are quite literally "turning the other cheek". The violence taken upon oneself from the offender is made visible and shown to be grotesque and shameful.

One's will and authority is never lost until one acts under provocation and loses his moral ground by striking back. When your child strikes her brother, you don't teach him to hit his sister until it is solved. We don't allow violence in the workplace, or in our streets, so why is it a national policy to ensure peace?

The parables and precepts that religion offers becomes meaningless paper when everyone takes them as metaphor and idealistic guides. "The Golden Rule" underlies most religions and moralistic codes, but what does that mean if we ignore it when we are angered?

When someone comes forth and embodies our morals as if it were just the most basic thing we have to do to survive, we get a look into the distant future. (I hope and believe this to be true).

Gandhi's biggest flaw was believing that everyone could live with the courage that he did. Perhaps, this is what kept him from giving up. Ultimately though, this can't be deemed a flaw if it is an ability to have a faith in your fellow man that he does not possess himself.

Chinese Typewriter

Well Everyone, here is the moment I've all been waiting for: The Chinese Typewriter!

This is a small educational lesson today. Most likely I will cover this subject with more jokes in the future.

As we all know the Chinese language has tens of thousands of characters. The history and development of the typewriter and the system for mechanically or electronically creating text in Chinese has undergone many frustrating changes.

Throughout the years other, less sympathetic countries, have made fun of the very idea of a Chinese Typewriter. We will not cover all jokes about the device, but I'll give you a little educational lift today.



Below is an example of a Chinese typewriter from about 1970. The tray at the bottom has a few thousand characters to use and that type case can be traded out for other sets if more characters are needed. The typist lines up a grabber for the character than hits a switch to imprint it on the paper. A good typist could average 20 characters per minute.

It seems to me like it would be just as fast to set lines of type by hand then print the whole page at once, but then again you'd have multiple charcacters on a page and so the 1,000's of characters needed would increase 10 fold or more.

There was another design that never was produced commercially called the "Ming Kwai" which means "Clear and Quick". The typewriter could create 7000 distinct characters. It could type additional "words" using combinations of characters, attaining a theoretical total of 90,000 words.

According to the daughter of inventor Lin Yutang the day she was to demonstrate the machine to executives of the Remington Typewriter Company, they could not make it work. The machine was fixed the next day, but Ming Kwai's obituary was already written.

In the digital world the computer can do thinking that a mechanical device can't. While the most widespread method of inputting Chinese on a QWERTY keyboard (standard keyboard) is the Cangjie input method inwhich the typist "builds" the characters. Each letter on the keyboard stands for a different basic construct.

The computer is much more versatile in its abilities to modify your characters, or use alternate input methods like drawing with a mouse or even voice recognition. Other methods are used, but the Cangjie input method took off due to not putting a price on the software that translates/modifies your keystrokes. It is available as freeware and is installed on most (Chinese) computers standard.

Thinking about this too much often gives me a headache. That's why Reverend Rick has to stop every so often to get my groove on. So here is a recipe to rock out. Remember M.C. Hammer? Apparently in "U Can't Touch This" when hammer is breakin' it down, his dance is called the "Chinese Typewriter".

The gist is that he's so fast he's navigating an enormous set of keys on a typewriter with his quick moving feet. Brilliant. Ya got me Hammy. Maybe he was writing a letter to the chinese people. If so, we can guess the words....oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Stop. Hammer Time.

Readers Questions

Dear first time, and soon to be loyal readers. I am starting this blog with the hopes that Reverend Rick can illuminate your night with the store houses of wisdom that he accidentally pre-ordered through Amazon. If you want me to launch a massive amount of this product at you, then stay tuned!

I hope that you, loyal reader, will e-mail me your questions and comments so that i may climb up on my soapbox and preach. Since I created this yesterday, i have yet to hear from you, so please send me an e-mail. Look in my profile for my address.

To get this blog rolling i have included a fictitious e-mail question. You may notice the readers name sounds questionable, but due to the fact that there is a city and state included under her name you may feel more apt to indulge in the pseudo reality of this farce.

Dear Reverend Rick,

I don't have a question for you, is there something wrong with me?

Miss DaPointe

Okland CA

Dear Miss D.,

While you may feel no obvious signs at first, there could be something terribly wrong with your parents. A lack of inquisitiveness runs in families, but since you e-mailed me with a question on why you don't have a question, you may in fact be suffering from an overproduction of irony instead. You might want to stay home from work today to better safeguard yourself from any irony that might occur. Of course, if you are a stay at home mom, don't follow these instructions, as conditions may get worse.

Thank you Miss D. for your mildly interesting question. Please send a better question in the future.

Reverend Rick

So, if you want the Soapbox treatment from Reverend Rick, don't be shy - send a reply!

ALSO: Stay tuned, because Young Dim One's Fortune says: Chinese Typewriter...EXPLAINED!