A Reader submitted question on the topic of: Norwegian-Japanese-Albinos

Dear Reverend Rick,

If I have $6 and my brother needs to borrow $7 how can I tell him he was adopted and no one really loves him?

- Honest in Omaha



Dear Honest,

What a wonderfully poignant question! It is both topical and sharp!

The greater implication of this query however, is addressing things like:

Is there an economic disparity between classes of people, are women's rights a right or a rite, is the glass ceiling a mosaic, is tic-tac-toe an Olympic sport or just a way of life, and is classicist hatred a viable tool for the economic dominance and control of 2 or more races?

Well, maybe I'm reading too much into your situation but perhaps not?. If your brother "happens to be" a Norwegian-Japanese-Albino asking for money and you are Girl with $6 and real parents, well - that stereotype is as borderline universal as a Polish joke.

I imagine the real question you should be asking is why doesn't he already realize that no one loves him? If he knows no one really loves him, his self esteem would be adequate enough to slough off the hatred of both family and the entire world, and if he doesn't know that he is both despised and adopted, maybe you have a larger problem on your hands!

After all, I'm doubting that you have very many other Norwegian-Japanese-Albino's in your family and if he doesn't realize that he's adopted already you are facing the reality that he's quite dumb too.

If you did all your fact checking then you know that Norwegian-Japanese-Albino's have the highest suicide rate among the island nations of Micronesia.*

*Carl will be missed. 

If your bother is poverty stricken, adopted, unloved, and dumb - then perhaps the best thing you can do is not to tell him anything at all directly.   

After all, he wouldn't understand your plea for him to despise himself and not feel like a member of the family - He's a Norwegian-Japanese-Albino! They have historically resilient personalities! And unless he's living in a hot and sunny place like Micronesia he might not feel suicidal at all!

I am assuming that at least one of his adopted parents tolerates him?

Perhaps you really need to petition your parents to maker harsher rules that limit his freedoms and thus protect your own freedom and your $6 nest egg.

This is a very modern method for securing your own freedoms and I will applaud you in advance for being so progressive. You simply petition the extension of your own rights via the limiting of your brothers.

Do you not want your brother going to dinner with you and your parents? Take them aside when your brother is slathering himself in sunscreen and slip them a couple of Washington's asking them to leave him at home more often, later you can increase your foothold by banning him from specific things or family events.

"Just think of the money you could save on sunscreen alone" you could tell them. Be creative, but always with the same basic message. You should steadily increase your bonds with your parents while making them wonder why they adopted him in the first place. In 2 short months he'll be listed on e-bay with a $5 "buy it now!!" option.

This situation makes me think of a common quote that was once said: 
"Those who don't know their own history are doomed".

I never knew what was meant by "doomed" and it always seemed ominous to me the time I heard it, so I'm using it here to let you know that this is the key to your own strategy or leverage.

Your brother is separated from his own history by circumstance and this is your best chance to secure your own parental love and $6 by keeping him in the dark until the day you spent enough time and energy lobbying your folks to hate him as much as you do.

Do the right thing and don't try to work out your differences between the two of you - it's hopeless! 
He's a Norwegian-Japanese-Albino!  
They are statistically the most warring race of people on this earth! - It's True!! **


Author's footnote:   
**A Norwegian-Japanese-Albino was once jilted by a friend once who refused to pay for his second Mai-Tai. The friend was not invited on the next outing. Carl bought Mai-Tai's for everyone then posted it on Facebook immediately.




Yours Truly,
Reverend Rick